clean
maa learnt to please my father despite being
a vegetarian she’d proclaim at least you were an easy child
rogan josh stewed pots swarmed the sink soaked her nightie
milky suds leeched the surface her palms pruned
she phones across the sea we ignore me salting scabs for preservation
i don’t recall finding her rowdy in the living
hair nettled holding carcasses blood raining or how long it took
to scrub the carpet white
sipping eggnog i confess to a man
i met at work drinks i want to return to childhood he knows
it’s not mine i am referring to a few nights later
his snores foam through the floorboards i stand for hours
cupping them as they fall saving the carpet i think
i will spend the rest of my life cleaning
Muskaan Razdan is an Indian writer, creative, and filmmaker based in London. She is an alumna of the Apple and Snakes Writers’ Room, the Roundhouse Poetry Collective and the Barbican Young Poets. Her work has been published in several magazines and anthologies, including Berlin Lit, Magma, Under the Radar, and Propel magazine. She was recently awarded the Roundhouse Film Fund for her short film Salt.